My name is Barbara Sandoval and I am currently in my second
year at Hunter College. I just recently decided that Media is the right path
for me and I’m not sure why it took me so long to realize that media was what I
wanted to do. I guess because I’ve been so brainwashed with the idea that I had
to get a 9-5 job at some desk doing some boring work in order to succeed in
this world but we all know that is not the case. I have been wrapped up in all
types of media since I was very young. I am part of the generation that grew up
knowing how to use a computer, I mean there wasn’t much to do but I knew how to
use it. Believe it or not, I actually got my first MySpace (remember that?) at
the age of 9! Now I didn’t do anything too crazy on there, but it was a whole
other world for me. I didn’t talk to anyone I didn’t know and I actually just
had some classmates as friends. It was so easy to just message them and talk to
them. I don’t really remember what I did there, but I knew I was instantly
hooked. As MySpace became the not so cool thing I immediately, along with all
my other friends, moved onto Facebook and then I eventually discovered YouTube.
Then Instagram came on the scene and now I am all over a bunch of social media
sites. I’m not very popular on ANY of them, however I am constantly consuming
all types of media. Even the “traditional” ones like Television, Film and
Newspapers, I’ve accessed them all through the power of the Internet. It’s safe
to say that I am a media junkie. However I’ve found myself filling my news-feeds
and timelines with a bunch of things that aren’t very useful to me or that help
me grow as a person.
Media hasn’t always
been my friend. Ever since I was a little girl I’ve always had these self-esteem
issues. I believe it is because I’ve been bombarded with so much advertisements
and having easy access to all these other “prettier girls” on social media,
that it made it easier for me to wallow in self pity and wonder why I didn’t
look like them. I remember my freshman
year of high school being on tumblr and searching “Skinny” on the search bar
and just feeling so disgusted with myself. Posts like this:
had a lot of damage to my 14 year old brain. Through many
years of soul searching and actually following blogs and accounts that were
body positive, I’ve learned to love myself just the way I am. I constantly look
back at the time when I felt disgusted with my looks and wonder how and why
that started? Is it because I am so used to only seeing one kind of beauty? As
an avid media consumer did I just go along with what other people told me what
beautiful was? Who was making content that only displayed one kind of beauty? I
had so many questions and till this day I still do. As a 19 year old I’ve
decided that I want to do something about this eventually. This is a serious
issue and it starts so early. I’ve noticed my little 8-year-old sister tell me
that she wished she had blonde hair and blue eyes. It broke my heart. There have been small changes so that younger girls can feel confident in their own looks rather than feeling like they need to fit someone else's idea of beauty.
Also this little box comes up now when you search the word "Skinny" on tumblr. Major improvement!
I’ve
decided that I want to stop consuming so much media and start creating it more.
I used to be into photography and I recently decided to pick it back up again.
Media is not a bad thing, it is a wonderful way to express and communicate
ideas and art in a different way. However it can be just as harmful if you are
just consuming it and not let it inspire you to make something of your own. Not
saying that we all have to be artists, but to just make sure that we allow
ourselves to still have our own opinions on things and not just go along with
whatever the Internet is saying. Whether it’s writing on a blog, or photographing
kids playing at the park or making a graphic art novel. Whatever it is, I want
to be part of a world that appreciates all kinds of art and beauty. So that
whatever 14 year old that is starting to consume all different kinds of media
is inspired to do something amazing with their life.
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